


At Summer's End, Find Me in Flowers

by mildewonrice



Category: OMORI (Video Game)
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Grief/Mourning, Includes some Hero headcanons of mine, Post Good End, Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-08
Updated: 2021-02-08
Packaged: 2021-03-13 15:01:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,384
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29280390
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mildewonrice/pseuds/mildewonrice
Summary: After years of hurt, grief, and indecision, Hero ventures to Mari's grave.He expected to mourn there alone, but instead he comes across a familiar face.
Relationships: Aubrey & Basil & Hero & Kel & Mari & Sunny (OMORI), Basil & Hero (OMORI), Hero/Mari (OMORI)
Comments: 8
Kudos: 123





	At Summer's End, Find Me in Flowers

_“I have to tell you something.”_

* * *

Carved into Hero’s brain was the collapsing feeling. His mind, which had been delicately pieced back together over the course of years, caving in like a flimsy deck of cards. He couldn’t describe it in words. Couldn’t place it. The blood stopping in his veins, the weak ghost of a person that had possessed him in that moment, it all felt like...someone else. He had lost himself on that day to the feeling, and it was taking all of his strength now to get back to being the man he had longed to be. 

He had never seen Sunny so resolute. The baby of the group had always seemed as though adrift, subject to being tipped over by a light breeze, both physically and emotionally. He had wanted to help him, to guide him. He realized now just how selfish he had been, how much he had been lying. How little he actually understood the person he had assigned victimhood to. 

_“Mari died, because I pushed her.”_

Hero had thought that finding Basil and Sunny a bloody mess in a dark room would have been the most scarring thing. He knew immediately at the sight that it would haunt him for a long time. He had rushed to their side, taking their vitals, wanting more than anything to get them help and then burn the sight out of his mind. But now, when he recalled that summer, all he could see was a dark haired boy in a hospital gown, facing them, one eye gouged out, uttering horrifying nonsense without batting an eye. Without shedding a tear.

It had made Hero sick. He was really just standing there, talking about her death like he was recalling a distant tale. The more he thought about it, the more the blood drained from his face. 

He had stood for minutes. Not being able to place that ice cold, yet red hot sensation rising in his chest. It seared him. It hurt. He didn’t want this to be him. He felt sad for a few moments, she wouldn’t want him to feel this way. He couldn’t be this emotional, horrible, _mess_ he knew he was about to devolve into. The conscious screaming at him to stop suddenly turned into real shrieks, real cries. 

_“Hero! Hero...please...it’s already bad enough.” Kel, ducking in front of Sunny, stared at him with wide, grief stricken eyes._

What had made it worse was that he didn’t seem all that surprised by Hero’s reaction. His terror stricken gaze bore through him, it was too familiar. Everything was too much, too many eyes on him all at once.

_‘What am I doing? When did my hand rise in the air? Out of my sight? Would I have hurt Sunny if Aubrey and Kel hadn’t interfered in that moment? The room is spinning, I’m back there. I’m back to who I was on that day. In that first year.’_

* * *

Checking. Counting. Needing to make sure he was all there. He couldn’t let any of his limbs out of his sight. If he wasn’t careful, if he didn’t check the correct number of times, it would all fall apart again. Someone would get hurt for real this time, and it would be his fault. 

Hero flexed his hand in front of him. Rolling it in and out of a fist. He didn’t want to be doing this, he just wanted to forget everything, to look out from the station and know everything would be okay. The late summer heat felt as though it were choking him, the dispersed light between clouds boring down on him. He sat on a familiar wooden bench, waiting to go back to a whirlwind of schoolwork, studying, and tests. 

The rest of that summer after the confession, he had tried his best. Losing himself in the chaos of three part-time jobs. Laughing together with Kel, his parents, and occasionally Aubrey. Weighing down on him was this shadow of an anxiety he couldn’t forget. The need to make up for the being he had been on that day. 

Sometimes, _they_ would come up in conversation. Kel would cry and Hero would try to hug him, console him. Do anything to try and make things better. But that horror tale was never something that could be chuckled away, never something that could be fully comforted against. Aubrey would try to logic through it, she seemed dazed as she tried to process it aloud. Hero knew after the accident by the lake she was still stricken, kept up at night by her actions. Through her stern facade she seemed to accept...even forgive them. Hero wished he could say the same. He just wanted things to go back to how they were on that night, the sleepover he had found himself lost in. The one where he had wondered if maybe they could keep in touch, hang out again. It all felt like another lifetime now. That dimly lit room was a completely distant memory. 

Hero put his hand down on the cold bench, the intrusive thoughts leaving him temporarily. _Can I really just go back, after all that. Live in the city, back at school after everything that’s happened?_

Hero didn’t know. He watched as his train pulled into the station, screeching its welcome before coming to an abrupt halt. He watched the people swarm around the center of the gray platform, taking their time to board. He knew it was his time, too.

Yet he couldn’t move.

_No, I have to go. Get somewhere, anywhere but here._

And yet no matter how much he willed it, he could not rise to his feet. 

Five minutes. Then ten. The train squealed to signal its departure, sealing the doors and jolting forward with a start. Hero sprung to his feet, making his way over as it began to take off down the tracks. He followed it at walking speed, his legs feeling as though made of lead, it’s engine huffed an earnest goodbye, and then it was gone. 

Hero stood, feeling nothing but the heavy humidity in the air and the stickiness of sweat pooling in his back. _This is useless now._ He held his ticket out in front of him, examining the front and back. The crunch of a loudspeaker was the only noise hanging in the air. Around him, strangers moved on. Businessmen whispered quietly to themselves and parents pulled children lightly by the hands onto carriages. 

He couldn’t fathom the consequences of his actions, his head felt light and empty in the summer heat. Before he could comprehend his nonexistent thought process, he was descending the stairs into the underground station, dark shoes clacking on the hard ground, the light gradually disappearing from behind him. 

* * *

Hero was a shadowy figure wandering through Faraway Town.

He felt as he walked that one slight gust of wind would cause him to completely blow over. 

The pounding white space in his head became louder, more deafening as he rounded the corner. All of those bright, sunlit trees, the quiet stillness of his home, nothing was able to distract him from the destination he had in mind.

_I’m...really here. Again._

An eggshell white fortress towered above him. The stained glass glinted in the afternoon sun, the shards refracting light to his feet. He stood several feet away from the heavy doors, taking a deep breath.

Sometimes, he had found himself standing here. Every time, he had looked on for a bit in thought, before turning around and making his way home.

This time, he could scarcely believe his movements. He was inside, the stuffiness putting pressure on his skull. The wooden walls seemed to groan, protecting the interior as best they could from the summer wind outdoors. There was no one inside. He brushed one hand against the pews, feeling the smooth surfaces lightly. 

* * *

_“It sure is hot, huh?”_

_“Kel, we’re in the middle of a sermon.”_

_“Ser...huh?”_

_“You’re supposed to be quiet in church.”_

_“Hero! Kel won’t stop elbowing me!”_

_“Well, Aubrey won’t stop shifting around! Just stay still and I won’t elbow ya!”_

_Hero let out an over dramatic sigh, “settle down now, kids.” Sunny was pressing against his left side, nudging him slightly as he turned the pages in a small, black book. Hero watched his brown eyes rapidly scan the text. From Sunny’s left, Mari watched on in awe. “I didn’t think you’d be interested in the bible, it’s pretty hard to read!”_

* * *

A chandelier flickered down from a warping ceiling. The tall, singular boy in the church watched the blinding sunlight crackle and dissolve through the stained glass to the building’s rear. His hand rested on a doorknob. Just one turn, and he’d have gotten the closest to her that he’d been in four years. One turn, and his streak of indecision would end. 

* * *

_"Ah, don’t be nervous, Hero!”_

_“Haha, I don’t want to be. But I’ve never tried out a song this complex before.”_

_“I’ll be your extra set of hands. Don’t worry, here,” Mari gently grabbed his left hand and placed it in the center of the piano’s keys, lining up his fingers so that he would be ready for the starting chord. There was a warm feeling in his chest he couldn’t quite place. He was nervous, but suddenly summoned the courage to play, to make that first move._

_He nodded his head at the black haired girl beside him. She gave a wink back as she brushed her long hair behind her shoulders, placing her hands at the far side of the grand piano, poised in the air. She had that focused look in her eyes again, scanning the keys. It was as if all distractions had disappeared around her. That was Mari, she had always been striking._

* * *

The scene in front of him was staggering. White light left him sunblind for a moment, before he was able to slowly recover. He took several breaths with his eyes closed, then opened them again. _I’m alive. I’m still here._

A dark green landscape expanded out in front of him. The grass blew lightly in the breeze, the blades tips were slightly discolored from the long season. All that could be heard was the quiet song of the wind and the distant cries of cicadas. 

Hero took one step, and then another. Before he knew it, he was halfway across the yard. Stone pillars gazed at him from the ground, winking at him in the glare. He felt as though nature were parting to let him through. Despite this, he had little guidance. He had just shown up, stumbled in, with little regard. Not a single rose to offer, no idea where she even was. He continued through the haze, realizing just how lost he had become.

Wait...there’s...someone else here.

Blonde hair glinted in the light, Hero raised a hand to his forehead to shield himself from the sun. That tiny frame, the flower in his hair…

Hero felt paralyzed suddenly. He could see the grave now. It had to be hers. To its right, a white potted flower swayed in the wind. Hero couldn’t remember its name. A pale boy bent down slowly, placing another pot at the stone’s base. 

_No, stop. Don’t go over there._ A part of him pleaded with another to turn back to the shelter of the building behind, but he knew this had been coming. He knew this was a sign he couldn’t turn back. He felt a lump in his throat as he progressed forward, the grass smoothing beneath his feet. With a jolt, the blonde boy turned around to face him. 

Electric blue eyes bore into him, widened by disbelief and then quickly twisted by fear and regret. The boy quickly shuffled to the side and looked back down at the ground, fiddling with his hands before he looked back at the scene before them solemnly. 

“No, it’s okay, Basil. I’m sorry I scared you.” 

He had wanted his voice to come out softer, but there was an acute edge to it. He looked on at the stone, trying to remember why he had come here.

_‘To our dearest, Mari. The sun shined brighter when she was here.’_

The words felt as though they were piercing through him. He read them over and over, and yet they continued to strike him. He sighed aloud, releasing the tension that had been pent up in his system. 

“I-I’m s-sorry,” a skittish voice tried to cut through the heaviness in the air. Hero felt as though roused from a dream.

“Don’t. Don’t say that.”

Hero shifted his hands, placing them in his pockets, he looked down now at the grass, the flora devoid of life and spent. He could hear the other boy shifting next to him, clearly taken aback by his words.

But Hero had meant it. He didn’t want to hear him apologize. Despite all of the hell Basil had endured, even incited himself to save his best friend, to partake in a fool’s errand, he still visited here. He still showed up when Hero did not. 

The taller visitor looked up now, his eyes watering. Something told him it wasn’t just the heat. He felt something stabbing through him, a pain he had tried so hard to repress. He raised a hand from his pocket to try and cover his eyes. There was a pause for a few minutes, before the blonde boy interjected again with a nervous laugh. 

“H-hey. It sure is hot out, h-huh?”

“Yeah. Haha, I really hate summer.”

“Me t-too. Me too.”

He looked down at the flower boy who was now kneeling on the ground, holding a trembling hand to his brow as he looked up, attempting to shield the sun’s glare from his eyes. Basil looked back towards the grave, his dry face cracking in a weary smile.

Hero took in the array of potted flowers surrounding the site. They were...astonishingly well maintained. Their colors were bold and lively. Really, only Basil could figure out how to support them in this environment. Hero cracked a smile of his own.

“I appreciate you putting these out here. Thank you.”

“Ah!”

Basil met his eyes again as he stood with haste, looking genuinely shocked to be receiving a compliment. He placed his hands in the pockets of his tan shorts, shaking his head. 

“I-it’s the least I can do.”

“I just...wish I had brought something myself.”

Basil looked back down, watching the petals sway in the gentle breeze. “I m-mean. You can always come back again.”

He began fidgeting once more, beginning to lose his composure, “Ah..t-that sounded condescending…I’m s-sorry...I-I mean...d-dammit...”

Hero watched the sunlight dance on the gray tablet in front of him. He wasn’t angry, just sad, and a little hurt. He understood this now. There was something he’d wanted to ask for a few months now, something he’d been avoiding.

“Basil.”

“Y-yeah…?”

“Sunny. Do you know how he is?”

Hero turned to look at his only company again, who was now eyeing him curiously, tears beginning to collect under his eyes. He was still white as a sheet, still looking slightly sickly, and even though the truth had warped Hero’s emotions, he still felt a pang of sympathy when he viewed him, like always. 

“I haven’t talked to him s-since that day.”

“Oh. Yeah, I understand.”

“I…” Basil paused before he continued, a gust of wind blew his hair in front of his face, shielding his expression, “I heard...you almost...hit him. Is it true?”

Hero felt the knot in his stomach drop. He felt as though the gravesite was dissolving before him. He began studying his right hand again, taking a few seconds to breath.

“I’m sorry. I-I shouldn’t ha-“

“It’s true. I didn’t realize I was-“ Hero paused, the words had only just escaped him and he already wanted to edit his statement, he didn’t want to victimize himself, “I almost did, yes. I’m glad the others were there to stop me. I regret it...I think about it everyday.”

“I understand.”

Hero felt a sense of relief envelop him, the tension fully draining. He let out a breath he didn’t realize he was holding. His words hung in the air before disappearing, he didn’t realize how long he had been storing them. How long he had spent locking them away. He wanted to speak more, to connect as much as he could.

“Basil. Do you...hate Aubrey?”

Basil no longer seemed startled by his sudden questions. He put a finger to his chin for a second, deep in thought, before giving a quick shake of his head. 

“No, I-I don’t,” he looked down at his shoes as he responded, staring at the soil which lined them, “I-I’d be upset w-with me too, she really th-thought I had destroyed those pictures. She d-didn’t mean to push me…”

“That doesn’t make it okay though,” Hero could hear the softness returning to his voice. It came out smooth, floating in the summer air. He felt as though after all this time, he was finally becoming _himself_ again. He brushed some of the hair sticking to his forehead away, making eye contact with a somber looking Basil.

“I-I know. I d-do want to fix things anyway, though. Eventually,” his hands were balled up at his sides as he gave a quick grin to Hero, before turning to face ahead. His moment of confidence was brief, but the brown haired boy was still impressed. Basil was soon looking back down at his shoes, the moment of energy leaving him, “if she w-wants to, that is.”

“I think she does, honestly.”

Basil studied him for a few seconds, eyes wide, before nodding and finally fully relaxing. They stood there in peaceful solidarity for a few more minutes, feeling the humidity lift, the day finally tipping over into a cooler afternoon temperature.

* * *

Hero stood at the front of his single, below him he could hear the nonstop buzz of a busy city. 

It was different, it was livelier, yet scorchingly intense. He watched the silhouettes of towers in the distance, the apartments carrying his eye to the horizon. 

His family had made another emotional departure after helping him sort his things. His mom frantically making his bed and polishing his supplies, then weeping and embracing him in a hug at the building’s porch as she waited for his dad to bring the car around. Kel had given him a thumbs up as he walked away, whatever he had said beforehand obscured by the roar of the traffic in the city street. 

He was ready to start the year. Hope swelled in his chest as he imagined the possibilities. It would be hard, especially alone. But anything worth having had to be worked for. All was set, except...

There was one last thing he needed to place.

A cool maroon vessel between his palms, and out of it, several vivid roses of assorted colors. Basil had doted over it at his home, sinking into an animated explanation of their care after a warm, tearful hug of greeting from Kel. 

_"I-I want you to t-take this, if you’ll h-have it. I-in spring, I can show you h-how to take care of more flowers, if you’d like."_

Hero smiled at the memory, he was excited. People said he had a knack for cataloguing information, he hoped to get it right. 

After several minutes of painful deliberation, he decided to place it on the desk facing the window. He paused in a thinking pose for a moment, before confirming it. _Not too close to the glass, little risk of falling, enough sunlight. This should be good!_

Hero took several steps, it wasn’t far from one side of his room to the other. It was slightly daunting, alien, yet familiar. He stepped outside. As the summer came to a close, he pictured the cool breeze that would accompany a calm fall. In the morning sun, the roses blinked at him, he blinked back.

He turned around with a smile as he exited, remembering some faraway memories, and then gently closing the door. 

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry, I'm also a kagepro fan, had to lean into the summer imagery a bit. Writing Hero made me pretty sad, his potential reaction to the hospital scene in the good ending intrigued me, so I decided to try my shot at getting it right. Hope you enjoyed!


End file.
